Want to know what it feels like to be a zombie, one of the living dead? Easy. They just done gone PAID me to try it out at work. “Phil,” they chorused from the depths of the black abyss, “Do our bidding and upload all this data into ye olde Database of Despair. Do it for Hours On End, and never stop, never cease, never tear your bleeding eyes from the luminescent screen until you are Done. Do it Phil, do it now, for it our will and you shalt obey.”

So I sat here and typed and uploaded and mouse clicked and surfed through the database for hours on end, and sure enough, at the end of it when I stood up swaying and emerged from my office I felt like a zombie. Couldn’t walk straight, eyes strained and buggered out, lurching forwards as I sought to just walk around, stretch my legs, no aim no goal in mind. I had this moronic expression on my face, and kept squinting my eyes closed to get the glare